How to Use eHarmony Effectively: Get Responses, Phone Numbers, and Dates! (2024)

More and more singles are using online dating to get dates.

Depending on how busy you are, where you live, or how good you are at starting conversations with strangers, it can be difficult to make meaningful connections in your daily life.

Online dating allows you to overcome most of these roadblocks and gives you access to a larger pool of potential partners than you might find in your everyday life.

Another benefit of online dating is that it allows you to get spend as much time as you need to get to know your matches before meeting them in person.

If you feel nervous about going on a first date, messaging back and forthwith your match can help ease those nerves and get things started more smoothly when you do eventually meet facetoface.

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You probably already heard about popular dating apps like Tinder and Bumble which are great if you are still in your early twenties and just looking for something casual.

However, if you are looking for something more serious eHarmony is a much better choice.

eHarmony is one of the most popular premium dating sites because of the large number of serious relationships that start there.

Today we will take a look at some tips that will help you to maximize your success rate and get more dates.

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Spend Time on the Questionnaire

How to Use eHarmony Effectively: Get Responses, Phone Numbers, and Dates! (3)

It’s the first thing you’re asked to do and it may seem obvious, but you’d be surprised how many people try to breeze through this very important part of the matching process.

eHarmony has an extensive questionnaire and it’s important that you take your time to answer these questions thoughtfully and truthfully.

This will be the main way the algorithm finds potential matches for you.

Instead of sifting through hundreds of profiles, eHarmony does the sorting for you so in order for it to give you the best possible options you have to take your time with the questions.

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‘In Your Own Words’

Don’t slouch on the “in my words” questions. This is one of the places where you can let your personality shine.

Answer at least four of these types of questions. Use full sentences and try answering them as you would if someone was asking you in person.

Remember, your matches will be curious about you and will be using everything at their disposal to get a better sense of who you are to decide if they want to respond back to your messages!

Tell Them All About Yourself

How to Use eHarmony Effectively: Get Responses, Phone Numbers, and Dates! (4)

It can be difficult to describe yourself, but it’s crucial that you take the time to thoughtfully fill out your profile.

One of the top reasons singles don’t respond to messages or initiate contact is that the ‘About me’ section is either not completely filled out or there isn’t enough detail.

It’s not about conveying every little aspect of who you are.

Rather, you want to show the aspects of your personality that you value the most.

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Say Cheese

While compatibility goes way beyond looks, appearance is still an important factor in making a connection.

Statistics show that posting a photo will up your chances of meeting someone by a factor of 9. That’s huge!

And no wonder—no one wants to spark up a conversation with the Invisible Man or Woman.

eHarmony allows you to post up to 12 photos, but try to add at least 3 to your profile.

The more photos you have, the more time potential matches will spend scrolling through your profile.

Make sure you’re clearly visible in your primary picture—don’t make it a guessing game with multiple people in one shot!

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Communicate

How to Use eHarmony Effectively: Get Responses, Phone Numbers, and Dates! (5)

Now that eHarmony has curated a list of potential matches, it’s time for you to begin reaching out.

eHarmony uses something called “guided communication” to help you get to know your matches at your own pace.

There are four rounds of guided communication: get to know each other, must-haves/can’t stand, learn more, and open communication.

Most people go through these steps when first contacting a match, but it’s especially handy for those new to online dating or who are naturally a little more reserved.

You can, however, skip straight to direct communication if you both prefer.

However, if you choose to proceed, make sure you actually message your matches.

This is especially important for women who are more likely to wait for men to start a conversation.

If you don’t show some initiative, you may miss out on the perfect match!

Read more: How To Keep a Conversation Going Online?

Be Open

You never know who that special someone will be.

eHarmony has matched you with people that you are highly compatible with, even if on first impression they don’t seem like your usual “type.”

Just because someone doesn’t check all the boxes doesn’t mean they aren’t The One.

If your interest is piqued even a little, there’s no harm in learning a little more about them because you can always end your communication if it’s just not working out.

If you’re interested in getting out of your comfort zone, take advantage of eHarmony’s Flexible Matching by changing your “How Important is this Preference” rating on things that aren’t absolute deal-breakers.

For many singles, talking to people online is much easier than striking up a conversation in person, and if you follow the tips that we discussed you can make online dating even more effective.

Thoughtfully filling out the questionnaire and your profile, taking initiative in messaging your matches, and being open to new possibilities will increase your chances of finding your perfect match.

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What to Do If Your Eharmony Matches Don’t Respond?

If you‘ve been using eHarmony for a while and are starting to feel frustrated because your matches don‘t seem to be responding to your messages, there are a few things you can do.

First, make sure that you are sending engaging messages.

If your messages are boring, it‘s no wonder that they‘re not getting much of a response.

Take some time to personalize your messages and make them specific to the person you‘re writing to.

Second, try to be patient. Not everyone is online all the time and some people take longer to respond than others.

If you‘ve been messaging someone for a while and they still haven‘t responded, it‘s possible that they‘re just not interested. Don‘t take it personally and move on to someone else.

Always remember that you can‘t force anyone to like you so if someone is not interested in talking to you, don‘t waste your energy on them and instead focus on finding someone who is.

Finally, if you‘re really struggling to get any response from your matches, it is possible thateHarmony is just not the right choice for you.

There are plenty of other dating websites out there, and sometimes it‘s better to move on than continue beating your head against the wall.

What Does It Mean When Someone Says Goodbye on Eharmony?

One of the most confusing and frustrating experiences is getting a goodbye message on eHarmony.

What it basically means is that the person you were chatting with is not interested in talking to you anymore.

If you receive a goodbyemessage, don‘t take it personally. The person who sent it probably just wasn‘t feeling a connection and decided to move on.

There are plenty of other singles on eHarmony that you can talk to so don’t waste your time on someone who is clearly not interested in getting to know you.

Read next: How to Ask a Guy Out Without Getting Rejected?

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How to Use eHarmony Effectively: Get Responses, Phone Numbers, and Dates! (2024)

FAQs

How to use eharmony effectively? ›

Seven eharmony Tips and Tricks to Make the Most of Your Membership
  1. Your eharmony Profile is Your First Impression. ...
  2. Treat Every Message as an Opportunity for Connection. ...
  3. Get Your Flirt On. ...
  4. Prepare to Keep the Conversation Flowing. ...
  5. Be courage and risk to be vulnerable. ...
  6. Keep an Open Mind. ...
  7. Getting to Know Each Other Takes Time.

How do I get more dates on eharmony? ›

How can I get more matches on eharmony?
  1. Log in.
  2. Click on the Discover tab at the top.
  3. Scroll down to the bottom of the list, where you'll see your Member Preferences.
  4. Select Change Search Criteria.
  5. Think about widening factors like age, location, and height to get more profiles.

Why does no one reply on eharmony? ›

Make sure you are sending good messages, and that your profile is in good order. People might be busy, taking a break, or just not interested in you. At eHarmony there are limits to what you can do without a subscription.

Should you give out your phone number on eharmony? ›

It's best not to exchange personal information before meeting up with someone in real life, and you should take many precautions before doing so if you do choose to meet. If you do want to continue the conversation beyond the app or website you met someone on, use a second phone number.

What age group uses Eharmony the most? ›

According to April 2020 survey data of adults in the United States, four percent of respondents aged 18 to 29 years were currently using eHarmony. Adults aged 30 to 44 years were most likely to use the social dating site, as seven percent of respondents from that age group confirmed being current users.

What should be the first message on Eharmony? ›

Whatever would interest you is what you say to them. Expand your conversation and connection so that you get to know the basics of each other. You are prequalifying your date, and setting up conversations that you can expand on when you are meeting in-person.

What is the highest compatibility number on eharmony? ›

Our compatibility points system, which ranges from 60 to 140, is based on your and each individual member's combined Compatibility Quiz results and preferences. Overall, it can help indicate how well you and your another member will get along.

How to get better matches on eharmony? ›

Change your search settings as needed. If you're having trouble finding matches or are curious about dating someone new, consider adjusting your eharmony search filters. It's often the easiest way to find a match who may surprise you. Expanding your search radius by just a few miles could make all the difference.

Can someone see how many times you view their profile on eharmony? ›

Yes, eharmony shows multiple profile views. The visitor list is updated every time a member views a profile. If you have visited a profile multiple times you will be shown first in the visitor list of other members every time.

What is the two-day rule in dating? ›

The 2-day rule is based on assuming too much based on too little with a whole lot of unfounded expectations from the past thrown in. Sometimes it doesn't mean anything. The only real rule is you won't know how someone will respond until you do. So, risk rejection.

What is ghosting on eharmony? ›

One of eharmony's relationship experts Laurel House says: “Ghosting is when someone who you are dating suddenly vanishes. They stop responding to texts. They don't call you back. And they may have flaked on your final date.

What does two ticks on eharmony mean? ›

If you see one green check beside the message, your match has received it. If you can see two green checks, your match has read the message.

How do you spot a catfish on eharmony? ›

By doing a reverse image search, you can verify that the photos are real and not stock pictures or images stolen from someone else. If you find your beau's picture on a bunch of different dating or social media profiles, he might be a catfish. But don't stop there!

Can you talk to people on eharmony without paying? ›

eharmony Membership & Costs FAQ

Every eharmony member starts for free with a Basic Membership, which allows you to get acquainted with the eharmony platform. If you want to explore all features and get access to unlimited messaging you can upgrade to a Premium membership for 6, 12 or 24 months.

How do I say goodbye on eharmony? ›

First click on the “Discover” section. Then click on the profile of the person you want to remove from your list. You will now see a menu in the upper-right corner which you can open with one click. There you will find the option to “Remove partner”

How to get better matches on EHarmony? ›

Change your search settings as needed. If you're having trouble finding matches or are curious about dating someone new, consider adjusting your eharmony search filters. It's often the easiest way to find a match who may surprise you. Expanding your search radius by just a few miles could make all the difference.

What is a good compatibility score on EHarmony? ›

Your score will vary from match to match, depending on your mutual compatibility. According to eharmony, 100 is a good compatibility starting point for each match, and it encourages you to reach out to matches with a score of 100 or higher.

What is the real success rate of Eharmony? ›

eHarmony Marriage and Divorce Rates

It has been directly responsible for more than 600,000 marriages over the past sixteen years. Plus, the divorce rate of married couples who met on the platform is 3.86%, which is much lower than the national average of 50% of marriage rates [1].

How do I make a good Eharmony profile? ›

One of our eharmony relationship experts, Dr Lalitaa Suglani, summarizes: “To write a good dating profile, focus on authenticity, positivity, and clarity. Include a mix of photos that showcase your personality and lifestyle. Be honest about what you're looking for in a relationship.

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